Saturday, February 26, 2011

So this parenting thing... hard.

Pippin is nearly 16 months now and getting more independent and person-like by the day. I feel like I've hit my stride (to a certain extent) as a stay at home mum over the last month or two (yes, it really took that long... oh my) and I am lucky that Pippin is a bit of a creature of habit and seems to like the routine we have settled into, which looks something like this:

7am up and breastfeed
8am breakfast for all
8.30-10.30ish morning activities usually around the house but sometimes we run errands
11am lunch (I usually eat this with Pip, I am often hungry by this stage and it gets it out of the way so I don't have to waste precious Pippin-nap time on eating)
11.45ish breastfeed
12noon - 3pm (ish) Pippin sleeps and I do stuff (like blog, clean, crochet, sew, drink tea)
3.30pm afternoon snack
3.30-5.30pm afternoon activities, trip to the park or library, playgroup etc
6pm dinner (usually for us all - again it gets it out of the way so I can actually sit down later in the evening)
6.30pm bathtime
7pm breastfeed and then into bed

It looks very organised like that doesn't it, of course I leave out the bits where - on days that I am very tired or not feeling terrific - I spend time staring at Pip wondering what the heck to do to entertain him, or wishing that I could just do what I feel like instead of having to cater to his needs first.

On the other hand I feel so incredibly lucky to be able to spend this time with him. So blessed.

Yet simultaneously embarrassed... shouldn't I have a 'real job' and be doing something of 'real value'?

Oh, hang on. I AM. I just re-read this awesome post at Apron Strings to remind myself.

Because I DO have to keep reminding myself. It is so easy for me to minimise the work that I am doing here, now,  every minute that I am taking care of Pippin. Friends ask me what I've been up to, or new acquaintances ask me what I do, and I usually say 'oh, just taking care of Pippin' or 'oh, I'm just a stay at home mum.'

What I do is not 'just'. It is not 'merely'. It is not 'less worthy'.

I am actually raising up a human being and that is infinitely valuable work. It is NOT work that should be farmed out to others as a matter of course (although that 'village' that people always say is needed 'to raise a child' would sure come in handy sometimes).

Wow, I feel so defensive about this. I didn't really realise until I started writing it all down...


  1. I really appreciated that post, Verity. Why do we mums have to keep reminding ourselves that mothering (our work) is not only the hardest work we will ever do, but that it is indeed the cornerstone of civilisation?
    This precious, sometimes difficult time with our wee ones, will all too soon pass - my littlest is going to kinder next year (boy don't even get me started on that one!)
    You are definitely worthy, Verity.

  2. Oh Lu, what a big time of change for you... How different it will be! Exciting and scary too I bet. I hope you're able to savour as much home time with your little Miss B as possible, it will definitely go quickly! Xoxox


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